Thursday, August 11, 2011

Have faith..

When I was a baby, am not among baby yg kiutmiutlagiadorablemacamnakpicitpipi. neaaahh~ Wasn't like my mother who is pretty and has fair skin, I have dark skin and hairy. =.= Trust me, it's really makes Mama upset. Her baby girl wasn't cute at all. Plus bila ada org tanya Mama, "is it your baby?? Macam anak keling je.." PAP! Naseb baik baby lg time tue, x tahu nk kecik ati. Yg tahu cuma senyum tanpa gigi. Tp usaha senyum tetap ada.

Not a good start bila waktu  kecik pon da kena condemn. But it's okay, HAVE FAITH you ugly duckling. sigh.

With Abang in the airport.
Mungkin agak cerah sket, tp mungkin jugak disebabkn bedak separuh botol yg ditempek Mama di muka sy membuatkn kelihatan agak cerah. (",)

When I was in primary school, I have a dream to go to MRSM. Everytime lalu je dpn MRSM Langkawi, I always told myself that after UPSR I want to enter this MRSM. I always fond MRSM Langkawi because at my age of 12, it's still a new building with super cool facilities which other MRSMs didn't have. So, I really hope I could be among brilliant students yg akan masuk MRSM. But unfortunately, am not clever enough when I only got 3A's in UPSR which obviously ain't qualified to enter MRSM. Bukan x layak masuk je, nk apply pun x layak. pffffft.

But it's okay, HAVE FAITH you dumb ass. =.=

Since then I study so hard to ensure that I'll achieve my next target to be a University student. Not just study hard, but I also asked my parents to send me to the hostel outside from Langkawi. A girl school actually. Can u believe dat? Normally, parents yg beria nk antar anak g skolah asrama but in my case, it's vice versa. Sampai Mama pulak yg risau. "Bole ke I nk berdikari? Bole ke I nk basuh baju sendiri nti? Bole ke I nk hidup x tgk TV? Bole ke kalau I mkn lauk yg sama every week? Bole ke I nk kena bgn awl time cuti? N bole ke I nk stay in sekolah perempuan sahaja??" She's so worried yg I akan jd lesbian, pengkid or tomboy nti. LOLOL But I told Mama not to worry. I just wanna be independent and more focus on my study. And Alhamdulillah, I managed to get 6A's in PMR. =)

I did hope for the same, success in my SPM. When trial I got 5A's, I'm so confident that I could get more in real SPM. Cikai-cikai 7 or 8 A pown ok la kn. But who knows, in real SPM I got less than 5A's. Am so frustrated. 3 hari menangis dlm blik and keep blaming myself.

And for that, HAVE FAITH you OVER-confident-girl. tsk.

Somehow, I still be able to make my dream come true to get into University. A perfect University, UiTM dihatiku. *wink* Alhamdulillah, I managed to finish my Diploma and Degree on time tanpa pernah sangkut / repeat paper. Malah hasrat untuk mendapat Anugerah Dekan / Dean List juga tercapai. Tapi cita-cita ingin tamat pada tahap pertama / First Class Grad x tercapai. Cuma mampu mendapat Second Upper Class. damn.

So, HAVE FAITH you playful girl.

When we're talking about personal stuff, I'll consider myself as not lucky in love. Be in 6 years relationship and end with nothing is pathetic. Well, I have to admit it makes me scared sometimes. Afraid of getting hurt again.

But it's okay, I keep telling myself to HAVE FAITH my dear heart..

Chasing my dream career is my next issue. Even though I knew I could not / would not fulfill it yet I still wanna give a try. Because the major problem with me is am so KEPALA KERAS (stubborn). And I won't give up until I know I couldn't afford. Which usually in the end of the day, I sedih sendiri.

This is because I always HAVE FAITH in me...

p/s: Whatever life gives you, even if it hurts, just be strong and act like you’re okay. Strong walls shake, but never collapse.

pp/s: Have faith pretties..